After two years of being best friends, we finally confessed our feelings for each other. Essentially, it felt like we were dating all along, just without the physical intimacy. Adding sex to our relationship seems like a natural progression, but there’s a significant hurdle-we’re both total bottoms and the idea of topping is a complete turn-off for us. Can a romantic and sexual relationship still work?
It’s not impossible for two bottoms to have a loving relationship, but it’s quite rare, like a once-in-a-lifetime event. If the thought of switching roles is out of the question, it boils down to how you both perceive sex.
Consider your past experiences: were either of you regularly seeking sexual encounters as a bottom, finding fulfillment in frequent physical connections? If so, a monogamous relationship might not satisfy those needs.
Alternatively, are you open to using sex toys or engaging in other forms of intimacy like oral sex, mutual masturbation, or fingering? These could offer satisfaction beyond penetrative sex, though they may not completely replace it.
Another option is an open relationship, allowing both of you to seek what you need from others while maintaining your bond. You could easily find interested partners by advertising as two bottoms looking for a top. However, if your desire is to share that intimacy with each other exclusively, an open relationship might not be the answer.
It’s crucial to discuss these aspects with your friend before diving into a sexual relationship. If you choose to become boyfriends, consider having a backup plan if it doesn’t work out romantically, so you can preserve your friendship.
Be honest with each other about the risks: say, “If the sex isn’t fulfilling, let’s communicate openly and return to friendship.” If the idea of losing the friendship is too daunting, you might decide it’s not worth the risk. Ultimately, The decision rests with both of you.